MEOW!
{SPOILERS--Skip to my review of The Great Gatsby if you wish to avoid them}
Full disclosure: I find both of the Iron Man films wonderfully entertaining in their own right, but I don't consider them mind-blowing, a la Batman Begins or The Avengers. Cue Iron Man 3, from writer-director Shane Black of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005); he certainly loves Christmas, but it certainly doesn't help in the film's favor. Although Iron Man 3 contains a few hilarious one-liners ("You were really good in A Christmas Story."), and a climax with a surprising amount of twists and turns, it overall comes across as a boring and predictable ride along with pointless characters who have pointless motivations.
For instance: what's the point of Aldrich Killian's (Guy Pearce) EXTREMIS experiment to remain hidden by having The Mandarin/Trevor (Ben Kingsley/George Melies) *perform* as though he's the one causing all the terrorism, even though the experiment is already a villainous plan all by itself? What's the purpose of The Mandarin/Trevor himself? Black and Pearce's screenplay doesn't justify his existence enough to make him an important character. Speaking of nearly non-existable characters, what's the legitimate purpose of Maya Hansen (the lovely Rebecca Hall)? Is she just a one-dimensional character who is involved in Tony Stark (Robert Downey, Jr.)'s past, while also unexpectedly changing her heart and going against Killian's plan in the second half of the film? Apparently so. It's difficult to emotionally or logically invest in characters that either have no legitimate purpose at all, or come across as egotistical for the sake of being egotistical.
The film also suffers from a lack of imagination in its action sequences, even if the climax is reasonably entertaining. That airplane sequence you've probably seen in the advertisements? It's possible that you've been thinking the same thing: "WOW. How is Iron Man going to save all those people one by one in a uniquely creative way?" Well, the result is about as predictable and yawn-inducing as you can imagine. I know he's adjusting back into his normal self by the middle of the film, but really Stark? Couldn't you have put on the suit yourself and save those people instead of controlling a prototype to accomplish the job for you? The mark of a true hero isn't laziness, ol' sport.
Oops, save that for the next review in a couple of minutes.
And I know that it was inspired by this film rather than written for it, but it would have been AMAZING if "Ready, Aim, Fire" by Imagine Directions played at some point during the film. It would have added a sense of awesomeness that this film truly needed.
Time to be nice and talk about the good aspects. Robert Downey, Jr. once again seems to be having a good time with material that somehow doesn't seem to (hardyharhut) suit him this time around. He also develops a relationship with a boy named Harley (Ty Simpkins) that actually does have legitimacy. Unfortunately, it also shows the amount of potential the script had for Tony to develop into an emotionally complex human being. Instead, all we get are lines like "Dads leave. Don't be a pu**y about it." It's a funny line that could have been replaced with a more meaningful one. Such a pity, Stark. Such a pity.
Iron Man 3 is not a disaster of a film, but it's not one that I would sit through again. It's ultimately a film that aims for the skies and instead collects a puff. I will admit, however: the post-credits scene makes me yearn for a Hulk-Iron Man collaboration. Now isn't that right, ol' sport?
Oh...I guess it's time, ol' sport.
^Isn't she a beaut, ol' sport?
So ol' sport...The Great Gatsby is a film adaptation of the "Great American Novel" written by F. Scott Fitzgerald. You see, ol' sport, it was directed by Baz Luhrmann, who also directed William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet (1996) and Moulin Rouge (2001). Now you have to understand, ol' sport, that while this film is visually colorful and interesting, along with an ensemble committed to Lurhmann's vision, that vision can also cause a headache mid-way through, and may lead you down a road to so much boredom that you'll count how many times Jay Gatsby (Leonardo DicaptainoftheTitanio) says the word "ol' sport" in no more than twenty minutes. Sometimes being too faithful to a literary source can have a few faults, ol' sport.
But see, ol' sport, I want to start off with the positives, because I did find some entertainment value out of this adaptation, ol' sport. The costume and production design by Catherine Martin is absolutely exceptional; some of the costumes the actors are wearing PERFECTLY match the environments that they are performing in, particularly in a scene when Gatsby and Tom (Joel Edgerton) battle it out in a motel. The rich colors, the anamorphic widescreen treatment--I felt like a first class citizen, ol' sport. While the modernized-music does feel out of place with the setting, ol' sport, some of the songs, especially "Young and Beautiful," will remain in your dreams for days. Gotta give props to that ol' sport-ette Lana Del Rey for such a beautiful tune. The performances are also fine and dandy, ol' sport. Leonardo Dicaprio's performance as Jay Gatsby is notable, especially when he is nervous upon meeting Daisy (the BEAUTIFUL Carey Mulligan) for the first time in five years. Now that's truly an ol' sport for ya, ol' sport?
Oh, and Isla Fisher is quite a charmer as well. Sacha Baron Cohen is a lucky man, ol' sport.
Alas, there are some complications, ol' sport. The beautifully visualized style is not fully appreciated with the headache-inducing fast editing, ol' sport. Think of it this way: it's as if Zack Snyder teamed up with Tom Hooper and said "Ya know what we need to make it really fast paced so that half of the audience can't catch up?WARRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPSPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!" It's understandable that the story takes place inside the head of Nick Carraway (Tobey Maguire), but crazy people can have some sort of focus, ol' sport. Ironically, ol' sport, perhaps the "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRyagetthejistol'sport" should have also been infused throughout the second half, when it ultimately becomes a chore to sit through while counting down how many times Jay says "ol' sport" in the course of twenty minutes. You see, ol' sport, it gets annoying when somebody says ol' sport for the remainder of their lives. Isn't that right, ol' sport? Ol' sport? Ol' sport? Ol' futbol americano?
All joking aside, the film would have benefited more had it been an artistically crafted movie musical. They have the costumes, they have the sets, they have the source material, and they even have the music (although it would be more impressive if original songs were written instead). All that's missing are musically-talented performances and a focused vision to match it all. Hiring Luhrmann wouldn't be so wise since it would feel as if he's creating a sequel to Moulin Rouge (2001).
Luhrmann's adaptation of F. Scott Fitzgerald's novel should have been re-titled as The Okay-Should-Have-Been-Better Gatsby, but I would put it slightly above Iron Man 3 in terms of its enjoyment level. Despite the hyperactive editing and uneven pacing, the film has its moments of unexpected charm and visual interest. Don't go in expecting a cinematic masterpiece and you'll be alright. You got it, ol' sport?
Out of five ol' sports, I give The Great Gatsby....
Out of five George Melies', I give Iron Man 3...
Until next time,
STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS
and MEOW, of course!
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